Happy Birthday Mike!!!

My son is officially 20 now. Happy Birthday Kid! :D

This has become quite the consuming thought for the last few hours. He's 20. It's his birthday. I don't even know what he's doing for sure. I'm positive he's not doing what he used to do on his birthday. I doubt the Army lets you sit around playing video games while you chat with 50 friends and eat Doritos.

My friends are trying to cheer me up. I hate to be down in the dumps but it's hard to kick the crappy mood today.

I keep wondering if he'll even call me at all. or write. I'll take a letter. I just want to know that he's ok.

I keep writing when I'm tired. I think that's when I lose control of my ability to suck it up and just roll with it. I need to post when I'm awake, alert and (hopefully) in a good mood.


I'm not sure why this is so different from him being up in PA, 1800 miles away. Of course, up there he had his dad's family to support him (not that they all did but some were there for him). He was working a really good full time job, AND driving a tow truck to help out his friend (no pay - just tips) AND he was a volunteer fire fighter. He also raced ATVs and Motorcycles when he could. He is not the kind of person to just sit and be safe. BUT he did call me at least every other day, sometimes he'd call every day for 4 days in a row. If he didn't call, I'd see him online.

I know that no one can guarantee that anyone is going to be safe. Even civilians get hurt or even die every day doing "safe" things. I guess I just have to leave it up to a higher power than myself to do what needs to be done. And I'll also have to learn to live with it.